Tawa Muna

1. Street Vendor: 'Bili na kayo ng Relo!!! Gold Watch ito!!!
Pag namuti,Gold!!!
Pag huminto, Stop Watch!!!

2. GF: Hu...hu...hu. ..Bakit natin ginawa ito? Hindi na ako Virgin at dalawang beses pa natin ginawa!!! BF: Ano? Isang beses lang ah!!!??? GF: Bakit...Hindi na ba natin ulitin mamaya???

3. Couple Talking: Wife: Hon...Paki fix naman ilaw natin sa labas. Husband: Hellooo...Electrician ba ako??? Wife: Eh di paki gawa na lang hagdan natin. Husband: Hellooo...Karpintero ba ako??? Umalis si Husband...Pagbalik gawa na lahat ng sira sa bahay. Tinanong nya si Wife kung sino gumawa ng trabaho. Wife: Kasi kanina...A man saw me crying...sabi ko dami sira dito sa bahay, so he offered to help in exchange of either sex
or bake ako ng cake. Husband: So...pinag bake mo siya ng cake??? Wife: Helloooo...Baker ba ako???

4. Husband: Lagi na lang tayo away...Mag hiwalay na lang tayo!!! Wife: Sige...mag hati tayo ng mga anak!!! Husband: Akin ang mga guwapo at maganda! Wife: Sus!!! Pinili pa yung hindi kanya!!!

5. In Front of NURSERY WINDOW: Friend: Pare... pag laki ng anak mo... am sure magaling sya mag drive. Ama: Bakit Pare...malaki ba ang kamay? Friend: Hindi... Kasi kamukha nya ang Driver nyo.

6. Husband came home from Chruch...suddenly lifted his wife and carried her. Wife: Why??? Did the Pastor tell you to be romantic like this??? Husband: No!!! he told me to carry my cross!!!

7. Friend: Wow Pare...ganda ng sapatos mo ah. Husband: Oo...Surprise gift ng Kumare mo yan. Friend: Surprise??? Bakit...Ano okasyon? Husband: Wala...Nakita ko na lang sa ilalim ng kama namin yan kagabi.

8. HEALTH ADVISORY: 'Beer contains female hormones and can turn men into women.' After 5 Pints...Men becomes talkative... unreasonable... irritable...cry for nothing...and urinate while sitting.'

9. Wife: I'm warning you!!! Parating na Husband ko in one Hour!
Handsome Visitor: Wala naman akong ginagawang masama ah? Wife: Kaya nga!!! Kung may balak ka...Gawin mo na!!!

10. Wife: Himala!!! Aga mong umuwi ngayon!!! Husband: Sunod ko lang utos ng Boss ko. Sabi nya 'GO TO HELL' kaya ito uwi agad ako!!!

11. Wife: Labs...may taning na ang buhay ko. Huling gabi ko na to...Let's make Love. Husband: Heh!!! Tumigil ka nga. Maaga pa akong gigising bukas...buti ikaw hindi na.

12. Population Policies of the Countries: China: Stop at 1 child.
Singapore: Stop at 2 child. Philippines: Stop at 4 am.

13. Russian: We're first in the Space. USA : We're first in the Moon. Erap: We'll be the first in the Sun. USA : You can't go there...you' ll be burn. Erap: We're not stupid...We' ll go there at night.

14. Ano kadalasan ang sinasabi kapag NAUTOT? American: Excuse me. British: Pardon me. Pinoy: Not me.

15. SUMPA 'Hindi na daw makakatikim ng pinakamasarap na 'Sex' ang huling bumasa nito'. Papayag ka bang ikaw ang huling bumasa nito???

KAYA IPASA MO!!!

Source: Joeboy